Wednesday, May 4, 2011

a hole where my armpit was...

They added 3 more boosts of radiation, and just happen to forget to get to tell me..........customer service anyone!?!  Come on, when you give someone going through what I am going through an 'end date', try to keep it that way.  May 11th had become my focal point, I could see it, it was within reaching distance, most importantly I could count it on 2 hands......3 more days may not seem like a lot, and in the large span of things I know it isn't, but now I have another weekend of laying in bed trying to be careful to not have any more skin fall off.......then I have Monday, May 16th.......can't count that on 2 hands from today.

I am riding the pain roller coaster, which is unbelievably frustrating.  Some days I am up and doing stuff, sans shirt, but up--all gooped up and doing stuff.  Then I am awaken in the middle of the night with the same shooting nerve pain that I had after surgery, the radiation has irritated the nerves and they are literally firing back.  Poor Scott doesn't know who he is going to wake up to, the Dori who calls him on the phone (because he is out doing something productive) for him to bring me coffee in bed, I am perky and happy and make a joke about how large his head is.............OR the Dori who can't move, needs help to get herself out of bed, the thought of coffee makes her nauseous, and the pain meds make it worse...........this is a tough road for him too.  And you should see the kid do laundry....he is becoming a pro!

~~breast pictures below~~

Here are some pictures (though they don't really do the pain justice).  My armpit, which now has a hole, started with pain all over my chest and upper arm, like an internal bruise....then the visible burn started to show.  The pain is unbelievable, and it is very hard to keep that area from not moving....

Radiation fields and you can see a bit of my lymph-sleeve
My armpit April 14....not too bad
April 27
You can see the hole I now have in my armpit....taken yesterday
Aloe is my best friend

my "boost" lines


  1. That looks really painful, Dori :(
    Praying for a quick recovery once you get the radiation behind you!

  2. Hi Dori- wow-- I could almost feel the soothing aloe...I hope that heals SO soon. <3 love, Jenni

  3. Praying you manage to cope with the extra 'hits' without too many more problems.
    My husband refused to take pictures of me at my worst as there was absolutely no skin on my back or under arm. I really wish I had had the courage to stop prior to the 30 sessions.
    Even now I have complications as a result of radiation damage.
    In my thoughts as you complete your treatment Dori.

  4. I found that storing the aloe in the refrigerator was wonderfully soothing.